Sufficiency and Reliance

When our children are tiny, as their mothers, we are everything to them. We are literally their world for the first nine months. I love those first six months after birth, knowing that I am capable of providing everything my growing baby needs. I am sufficient, and she relies only on me. But as our little ones grow, they need more than we alone can give. They begin to taste something other than mother's milk; it is easier for them to away from Mommy's side for a short time. Soon after, they start to explore their world through crawling, then walking, then running. We can't keep them in our arms all the time. They need solid food, freedom to explore, and time away from Mommy.

The good, but also exhausting news, is that while we are no longer sufficient for our children, they still rely on us for many of their daily needs - for years. I am entering the period of motherhood where my children are growing up. I have more "big kids" than "little kids," and my baby is nearly two years old. I miss the days with a little one nestled in my arms breastfeeding. My job is still to provide sustenance for my children. After all, the first words out of Simeon's mouth in the morning are, "What's for breakfast?!" I am also comforter, educator, and companion.

While my children are home with me, my main task is to point them toward the One who always will be their Sufficiency. One to whom they can turn with every need and can always be relied upon. I may only be able to be enough and all for six months. Jesus is Enough and All for always. I pray that I show by my actions and words that I know this to be true. When I am tired, discouraged, lonely, anxious, angry, overwhelmed; may they see me at the feet of One who can refresh, strengthen, and offer peace.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness."

1 Corinthians 12:9

When We Can't, God Will

What do you do when one day after another seems to overwhelm you? Nothing horrible, but just enough to wear you down and leave you exhausted. When you have to clean up shards of broken glass all over the kitchen floor three times in four days... When the kids get a gastrointestinal sickness you after the other, leaving you with little sleep and your workforce cut in half. Because of this, you have to do extra chores despite being curled up on the couch with abdominal pain yourself. When most of your kids seem well enough for church and you have to teach Children's Sunday School anyway, so you load them and drive yourself leaving your oldest behind with Daddy, only to have no translator for the Sunday School lesson... When during announcements at the beginning of the church service your almost two year old vomits all over because a well meaning "Aunty" has been feeding her too many snacks for her recovering tummy... When for days the toddler is either sick and clingy or feeling well enough to mess up everything...

Have you heard enough yet? Ready for the piece de resistance? What do you do when your when your husband is home for the weekend while you are sick but is too preoccupied to help as much as he usually would because you didn't think to run upstairs during the pouring down rain and gale wind which blew water threw the open balcony door and killed his computer?

If you are me, you take a break on Monday morning during school time to bring a snack and a Bible up to the balcony. I'd been to busy to eat a proper breakfast and a bit afraid my stomach troubles would return if I ate. But I knew I really needed some sustenance, physical and spiritual. I snuck away without any of the kids noticing; some were playing outside, others doing schoolwork or resting on the couch. I nibbled stale crackers with leftover sliced cheese and ham, not exactly gourmet but sufficient for the task ahead. Read a passage on God's magnificence and care for His people. And gave everything over to Him.

I remembered that He is in control. In our weakness, He is made strong. When our tongue can't speak clearly, His Spirit can shine through. When we are at our end, He is our all. When we can't, He will. We may still have a few days and night of sickness to go through. We may have to spend too much money for a new computer or work with the relative inconvenience of my laptop. I may never know how much of the story of Joseph my bumbling Thai was able to convey. But God will take my brokenness and make a work of beauty.

In the meantime, I look forward to a better ending to the week, hoping that the chrysalis attached to our trashcan will reveal a beautiful butterfly, reminding us that God makes all things beautiful in His time. I also need to learn the Thai words for "dream" and "sheaths of grain" so that I can tell the rest of Joseph's story if no translator is available this week.